Anyone that knows me knows that I’m an advocate of freewill, a trait that is frequently misconstrued as stubbornness.
I am not a rules person. I’ve had minor clashes with authority figures and I will question anything that seems ehhh non-Linear and shady.
Because I suffered behind the tinted glass of silence most of my life, like not speaking up when I was raped. Apprehensive feelings that arose in my mind were unfortunately buried there too.
Therefore it is better to fly on the scrutinising wings of stubbornness than to be silent—- except when applying wisdom to silence.
I hated school uniforms and conformity. I questioned my parents, though non-confrontationally.
And yes, you’ve guessed it! I questioned God, time and again.
What is the true meaning of life if mankind must choose to accept the Good news, or be doomed?
This was something I wanted to know, but it seemed offensive, sinful even, to church leaders and christians.
Since it evoked negative emotions, I quit.
I serve God because of my upbringing coupled with actually witnessing his love coupled with feeling his holy spirit at times, this is why I believe.
However in an alternate dimension I may not know Christ, meet devious preachers that carry demeaning messages that twist the Good news for personal gain
I thought hard on why freewill isn’t a third option. Why one couldn’t mind their business, believing in neither, creating their own destinies while avoiding certain damnation.
Truth is, as appealing as it sounds, the world simply does not work that way. When I thought I had freewill, I ended up depressed and wishing for the grim reaper.
Freewill is the most ingenious, well-crafted deal that the devil recommended to trick Eve and her descendants.
But instead of God convicting me for my futile quest, he gently coaxed me into a deeper understand on why life works as it does.
Just how amazing is this God?
Turns out we can be free after all, not the one that offers debauchery and greed, but one that allows freedom to become our best selves within God’s love and grace. That’s how great he is, always one step ahead.
Therefore I rest my case… for now.
Thanks for hanging out with me today. Auf Weidersehen,