Her Lost World

Innocence strahls in with the sun

to whence a golden girl rests her temple

fog has been erased from her mind

darkness plays hide and seek with light

Silence feeds into her thoughts

cleanses her memories of impure specks

Seeping joy from an unconscious plane

From plexus to plexus, excitation overload

Irregardless if it is real or not

She shifts her weight between toe and heel

waiting at a shore’s harbour

For courage to be delivered to her sandy feet

She could be anyone she wished

she could have anything she craved

so why did she always turn back

to revisit the flames torching down her lost world.

Wanted: Best Friend

It is truly scary

when thoughts develop lips

then speak,

holding real conversations

like best friends, both mentally instabil

Whirlwinds trapped in physicality

How bad I want one

even loners need friends to survive

one who will be there a decade after

no matter the race, gender or preference

One I wouldn’t try so hard to keep

or give reasons to stay

one that doesn’t care about roots of my tangled past

and the thick thorns isolating my heart

so long as my ideas dance freely

and emotions bloom with every feeling

And maybe I’ve had one or five before

At a time I couldn’t value treasures

because being open is still funny to me

but I’ll ask the man above one last time

For a treasure who will stay

and the grace to not fuck it up.

Christmas wishes

I told myself the wishes I wanted

coz no other ear was listening

I needed a wedding gown

something subtle but glistening

I want to visit my many Christmas pasts

and hug me till I’m warm inside

stay up and talk about previous wishes

kiss me when I fall asleep

Amongst other things

A brand new job

to help pay the Mortgage

and prove I’m no slob

I have so many wishes

would love to check them through

soon a new year comes straddling

and we wish the old Adieu

But a lovely evening with you

hiding from the wind outside

decorating the Christmas tree

ho ho ho with yuletide

Hot cocoa cozied in hand

selfless acts of love I adore

Cheesy movies every night

is just as good or more

respect the process

I can’t hide emotions, my face will betray

I can’t say yes when I mean No

thunder billows and the earth quakes too

still my pupils are wide and my lips shut

at every chance, I frown a smile

take care of me , is No. 1 rule

may seem selfish but have no choice

give me a chance, or do you dare?

add another one in case I fail

I cannot be seen

I cannot be heard

taciturn, to say the least

not made of stones, like I pretend

Wish I were active like my rummaging thoughts

though I could never focus on something worthwhile

I’m not heartbroken, I’m really glad

can walk around and see Christmas lights

can lie on the ground and watch my thoughts

I’ve learnt to respect the process of life unfolding

Prefer dancing with tears in my eyes

Tomorrow will explain the reasons why

On a starry winter night

Hot wine in the advent market

Cinnamon lingers in the air

Ginseng leaves tapered by snow

on a starry winter night

Decorated trees in a corner in each house

Behind every boot follows a snowy trail

shadows melting in the inner city

on a starry winter night

Eyelids bejewelled with Icicles

Thick socks and warm scarfs everywhere

tete-√°-tete in an open furnace

on a starry winter night

snowflakes plastered on windowsill

Carollers forging through the snow

Eggnog and jolly cheers

on a starry winter night

Only thing I love about Christmas

That one song and roasted chestnuts

bingeing Home alone till I dose asleep

on a starry winter night

Memorabilia

Love me to the bone

I am the mirage of sin

that you keep secret

See through naked eyes

goddess of love and despair

found zen in the casted storm

I am mother, daughter, Cleopatra

box of memorabilia

Spectacle of dreams

the lotus i imagined

Leaves midnight roses

for long lost soul and loved ones

found beauty in words unsaid

A path to the inside of toppled tears

liquid death sprayed at high noon

No barriers left to mould

no spirit left roaming in the wild

nothing but a smegma of dysfunction

Left the cage open

unleashed a predator of habit

the answers are in risen flames

To the wildest amongst us

Tooth sunk in righteousness cloak

the more obscure the discomfort, the better

God said No

This was posted in a WhatsApp group and I couldn’t resist sharing.

I asked God to take away my habit.

God said, No. It is not for me to take away but for you to give it up.

I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.

God said, No. His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary.

I asked God to grant me patience.

God said, No. Patience is a byproduct of tribulations; it isn’t granted, it is learned.

I asked God to give me happiness.

God said, No. I give you blessings; Happiness is up to you.

I asked God to spare me pain.

God said , No. Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.

I asked God to make my spirit grow.

God said, No. You must grow on your own, but I will prune you to make you fruitful.

I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.

God said, No. I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.

I asked God to help me love others, as much as he loves me.

God said.. Ahh, finally you have the idea.

A Bitter Pill

Easy come, easy go

what is that saying about letting go

All she had left to remember

forehead kisses and dirty wishes

heart racing with no base rhythm

What is that saying about letting go

learning to move on is weird

some days are easy, some spell trouble

sometimes it’s like visiting an old neighbourhood

no one welcomes you home

Easy come easy go

drowned herself in love and loyalty

worse still she built a map of dreams

her heart melted and gave way

into a puddle of activated coal

She let you go,

so she can moan the stories she wrote

so she could feel the wind of complete peace

Swallowed a bitter pill

she may wait till eternity for this pill to settle

for shallow waves to sweep love back to her feet.

Let thy will be done

Sometimes I forget you see

that I’m not a bastard anymore

I’m still a careless child

but I don’t have to live in disconnect

trusting no one for so long as taught me to believe

that I had to survive alone in isolation

I had to think faster, work smarter

I tend to forgot that I don’t need to trade secrets to survive

neither do I need to keep secrets to feel a spur

it slips my mind. it really does.

There are layers to this journey called life

and likewise are there stages of the mind

but the biggest bullocks is of isolation

that’s when the voices become audible

sob a little louder why don’t you

no one can save you

it’s a dark droughty forest

one slip and you can sprain your ankle

and smash your head

scream louder but you’re still alone

doch!

what a noodle brain I have been

to forget I’m not alone

I had a father, and will have one for eternity

sometimes he breaths stillness in me

most times he prefers I move recklessly,

stumble on a table in a near psychotic episode

and he hears me loud and clear

he sees me when I visit our secret place

I forget sometimes that this place even exists

It needs a little spring cleaning, some home decor

but he’s there waiting

he sees my pain and replies, “it’s a process”

he gives me space in the darkness so I can ponder

that understand that there’s nothing truly there for me

I may scoff and curse, but in the end I utter the same words,

Father, let thy will be done.

Art has to be

Humanity believes

that art has to be beautiful

like a Hummingbird basking under the sun

and art has to be unique

like meteorites dissecting the sky in brillant shades

art has to be pure

like amethyst re-crystallised in an open furnace

art has to be in Galleries

like the cherubic oil on canvas in the louvre

art has to be worth millions of pounds

like a wedding ring made from dinosaur’s fossil

and art has be created by genius

like Yiruma on his Compose of “River flow in you”

I believe

that the source of art is most impure .

It is dirty

It is unbecoming

and it could be worth nothing

but most of all, I believe

true art is a journey to enlightenment

It summarisizes a story that is told

through the eyes of one person,

it’s creator.

Smile a little because, you’re art.